But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
oh, i've got big weekend plans. on an unrelated note, do you think viagra will work if the guy is roofied?
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
It's 2 am on the long weekend and what am I doing? Sitting alone in my room eating chips and queso and watching Rio. Fuck I need to get laid.
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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