So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Just looked in the mirror and i look like ive been gang banged. Im so proud of my boyfriend it almost hurts
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
there's nothing weirder than waking up to your mom eating breakfast on the couch that you fucked her coworker on last night.
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Could you just like have a friend who feels bad for me and secretly always wanted to have sex with me
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
Randomize
