Why are you such a perv today?
This is a lot to handle
Oh shh
I'm kidding you prude take a joke
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
You better be making out with him cause we're sitting here with this awkward british girl watching videos of goats singing maroon five
It's not even close to Halloween but there is a girl in a nurses outfit. Twerk or twat.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
I should get him a card "thanks for letting me use you for your penis on and off as I see fit and for being a nice guy. My boobs and I appreciate your loyalty and dedication"
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
THEY DIDN'T THROW MY PORN AWAY!!!!
I remember turning to Jon after doing a line of coke and saying "I was a Girl Scout"
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
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