gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
