Is it weird I updated my facebook status from my phone while I had explosive diarrhea in my boss's private bathroom?
That would be awkward if he commented on your status
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
True college students do jello shots in the library
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