It's a beautiful day for a hangover
you're in nursing school, now tell me what to do about a burned clit.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
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