sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
I'm running on two hours of sleep, a shot of vodka, and half of a granola bar. I can't be held responsible for what I do.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
Randomize