I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
You stood up and started yelling"Free blow jobs!" because you thought people would like you more.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
So I just crossed my legs and I was like what is this lump on my leg? Oooh its my underwear from last time I wore these jeans...
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
Blame the bisexuality and move on?
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
Randomize
