I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
i woke up today to a handjob from this really fat girl that keeps calling me michael phelps
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
You called me last night and said you had a vision that a cat made you a sandwich. You were tripping way too hard
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize