Erica just called me. She woke up in a storage closet in Mike's building with one shoe and no bag. Can you check your photos from last night to see if she had it at the bar?
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
I got vodka in my stocking. Having an alcoholic mom has paid off.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize