I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
Randomize
