I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
I've got to stop making out with the guys and sharing drinks with you. I'm the reason we all get sick at the same time. Sorry.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
Walgreens has pop rocks. Be prepared to get your dick sucked.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
right now I am washing the alcohol and shame off from last night
Randomize
