Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
Just made nicotine water. Ithink i'm having a heart attack.
I asked the full emergency room who else was there because of homecoming and every single person raised their hand
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
In other news there's 12 shirtless Korean dudes all trying to jump on a tiny little trampoline so that's entertaining
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