His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
Saw the college gyno today. It has now been medically confirmed that I have a perfect vagina.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Omfg 7 hour sex session who am I?
PS: I think I'm in love
Ability to walk tomorrow tbd
Randomize
