I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
he's paying for my abortion by participating in an alcohol study. dont try to tell me we wouldn't be classy parents
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
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