You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
I just put my eye make up on in the bathroom of the bar.... I may be too comfortable here....
Fucked a DJ on a jetski today... I love florriidaaa!
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
