She said I could do whatever I wanted to her. I pumped for 20 seconds, apologized, rolled over and passed out. I sit directly across from her at work. Awkward?
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
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