You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
How drunk are u on a scale of one to couldn't get it up if u had a gun at ur head?
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
Is it bad that I'm tracking my period with Instagram pictures?
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
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