Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
Nothing like moscato in your sinuses tobmake your night complete
I wasn't vocally whispering "she wants to bite your dick off" about that kirsten girl was I?
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
I pour the whiskey from now on
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
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