i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
Randomize
