Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
they just got in argument over who had more of your dick pics. quit sending shit to my sisters fucker
Randomize
