she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
Stumbled into class and into a desk. When I fell my bottle broke in my backpack. I had to leave there was vodka everywhere.
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
OH MY GOD DO YOU REMEMBER WISHBONE? DO YOU REMEMBER THAT LITTLE BITCH? WHAT'S THE STORY WISHBONE
I can't drink with the moms anymore. All they talk about is lactating.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
What are the chances I get my period 2 weeks early just as welcome week starts. My uterus is conspiring with my dead catholic grandma
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Randomize