Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
Things are going great. I have tons of beer, margaritas, and theres an inflatable swan in the mix.
im sitting in a tub with a sombrero on.. im just kind of confused.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
i'll prob lay in bed. its weird not having to track my wallet down, its become such a weekly habit. i suddenly have so much free time
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Randomize
