also i tucked his toothbrush in my shirt. why? i dont know.
Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
There's always time for handjobs
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
Do not ever get that redhead chem major high. Gave her a magic brownie and she sat in a corner and literally cried about organic chem. Never again.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
Randomize
