i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
Randomize
