so far i wrote 500 words for a paper on sean paul performing we be burnin..i can officially do anything on adderral
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
I just came so hard my vision went blurry. I can only hope one day I'll find a man that can accomplish what my left hand does on a tri-daily basis.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
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