this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
Randomize
