a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
i almost burnt down an apartment complex. little busy, get back to you later
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
I saw a 60 yr old mans penis last night. Just for the record.
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
