I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
I had fresh baked oatmeal cookies, tacos AND was on deck to give a stellar blow job. You'd think that'd be a win/win/win situation.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
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