i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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