just took a sink shower in Arbys bathroom
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
he kept yelling THIS ISNT AMATEUR HOUR
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
We're in the kiddy pool eating marshmellows and drinking wine out of a box. Please dress casual.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
My hands smell like vagina and ham.
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