508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
I love our relationship. We just get drunk, show each other our tits, demonstrate sexual positions and make pasta. Then you go to bed and I sit around with your mom and cry about how proud of you we are.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
She's chasing her own tail and is afraid of her own feet. My stoner cat, ladies and gentlemen.
That moment when you realize the hot british guy named rory you drunkenly made out with at a bar is American, is named Tyler, and has a girlfriend.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I think I've been inadvertently participating in a contest to see how many times I can show up to work hungover in my first year of teaching. And I'm the only participant. Not sure if I'm winning or losing.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
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