It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
I don't know if I want to cry scream puke or go somewhere and drink more. This is such a weird emotion.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
he got all sad that i was going to fuck his roommate, so i just asked him if it would make him feel better if I let him motor boat me. i am such a saint.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
Randomize
