Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
At least make sure they are 18
Why
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
I just sneezed weed. Kinda wanna try to smoke it.
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
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