why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
My 54 year old father just sent me a YouTube link on my school email titled "Walrus sucks his own dick" and then wrote in the email "I wish I were a walrus". What the fuck is wrong with my family?
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
Chapter 6 - how to lose your underwear in chicago
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
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