This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
Is it appropriate to get drunk, stand up at the wedding and make a toast to "the time the lovely bride asked me to come on her chest"?
our generation is not ready to get married
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
It's almost like he dry humped the last remaining bit of good person out of me.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Randomize