My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
I partied with a deaf mute last night. strangely enough the more drunk I get the easier it is to understand him.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Randomize