Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
