He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
Now he's talking about how he's writing in a journal because he doesn't remember "his thought patterns when he was in elementary and that's distressing". I'm walking home. Fuck this.
Bars not open yet, I feel like a desperate alcoholic wandering around outside.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
whose ass print is on the piano?
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
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