it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
the worst part was waking up this morning to his skrillex ringtone.....when was it ever okay for friends to let other friends go home WITH GUYS LIKE THAT!?
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Randomize
