So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
I was trying to be really smart and save 10 dollars for each cab there and back. ...so I ripped a $20 dollar bill in half.
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
I feel like I'm laying on a pillow cloud. With little baby angel fingers between me and the cloud lifting me up. Singing hymns in my ear.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
Someone stole a lamp last night.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
His name was Dragon. For real. How do you not sleep with a Dragon? Don't judge me.
Rebounding with her sister was the best idea i ever had.
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