Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
We were confused who drove until we went outside and her cupholders were torn out of the dash and laying on the ground
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
low point of the night : a cop just busted out laughing at me.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize