Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
i want you now
you need to stop dating girls with the same name as your mother...or stop drinking so much...I don't want to see this
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
Why doesn't he get that I would rather give him blow jobs than be in a relationship?
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
Just found a uh poem I wrote on ambien. It says to "cry your seamen filled tears" and "I hope you take a dagger to your vagina" and at the end it says "sincerely, God". What.the.fuck do they put in that pill?
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
we were looking for paper towels to wrap his hand and i yanked a drawer out of the cabinet, it was fun so we just kept doing it. things escalated and long story short, he isn't gettin his security deposit back
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize