did you get engaged???
I just did something awful... i just had to tell someone... i just used my brothers electric face cleaner as a vibrator
My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
I just made out with his twin, technically it's the same person..... Right?
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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