Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
I flashed a party boat full of Asians yesterday, didn't I?
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
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