That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
Randomize
