I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
Thank God I didn't lose my virginity to that asshole. That woulda been like winnin a raffle ticket for a free bag of dog shit. But with like a really pretty bag. A pretty bag full of dog shit.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
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