Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
I get off at the next exit which doesn't have a shoulder, a guy is riding my ass so I cant stop. I think I got as much puke on his car as on mine.
THEY HAVE VIAGRA FLAVORED GELATO
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
