You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
He is so amazingly handsome. I just wanna fuck every shred of decency out of him.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Speaking of church, everyone showed up to lunch in the dining hall in their Sunday best and I walk in looking homeless bc I just got out of bed. I hate this school.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
You know you were really drunk last night when you woke up and had someone else's jacket with their car keys and medical marijuana that you wore home from the bar and no sign of your actual jacket.
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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