I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
I cannot take someone's straight and gay virginity in one threesome. It's just too much responsibility.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
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