thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
Hung over does not do it justice. I am hung like a horse over. I am hungover and over and over. I am hung, drawn and quartered fucking over. They just told me I can't keep my sunglasses on in the office. Fuck drinking with you people.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
Randomize
